Little joyous moments: Padma and Josh’s wedding

By Kerry Abukhalaf 

Wedding location: Cleveland, Ohio

The setup: non-dancers with a vision 

Padma and Josh wanted a fun, non-traditional wedding dance that would keep things light and their guests engaged. The catch? Both were self-described non-dancers and disliked the idea of doing a classic slow dance. This is the story of how Steps to Love helped Padma and Josh create a standout dance that showcased their personalities and wowed the attendees. And how Padma and Josh discovered the joy of dance and had a romping good time along the way. 

The clients: a Bay Area love story

Could there be a more quintessential Bay Area love story? Each from  different cultural backgrounds, Padma and Josh connected through the magical algorithms of an online dating app. The attraction was immediate, and many dates followed in quick succession. COVID-19 restrictions hit soon after, but lockdown turned out to be more pleasure than pain. After a year under one roof together, he proposed to her at sunset in front of Point Cabrillo lighthouse in Mendocino. From there, it was a “mad dash” from proposal to wedding day, just six months later.

The context: something outside the box

Friends of the couple had a first-rate time with their own wedding dance coach, and learning of their experience, Padma and Josh were inspired to give it a try. They searched for a Bay Area wedding dance teacher and found Erin Parsley, founder of Steps to Love, while comparing profiles on The Knot. Erin’s profile stood out for her personalized approach to making wedding dances, and her fun, down-to-earth style. Padma and Josh were looking for something outside the box, and it seemed Erin would be up to the job.

The objective: a merry medley

Padma and Josh needed a dance teacher who could create a custom dance set to several choice pieces of music. Padma describes it as a fun medley of dances. Both had visions of what a meaningful dance would involve, but needed choreography and direction. They also wanted to raise their comfort level on the dance floor. Nervous, frozen moments were not an option for these two.

The challenges: many moving pieces

The wedding would take place in the groom’s childhood church in Cleveland, Ohio, and the reception at the historic Hyatt Regency Cleveland at the Arcade. With the help of a Cleveland-based wedding planner, Padma and Josh would be making arrangements from the West Coast, where they lived and worked. Covid-19 restrictions meant that the wedding needed to be well-planned, especially with more than sixty guests flying in for the event. The tight timeline and Padma’s busy work schedule meant that every day had to count.

Padma is originally from India, and traditional Indian weddings don’t include a first dance. This was new territory for her. She’d also seen anxious couples going through the motions before, and she wanted to avoid that experience at all costs. Josh felt the same, but he was looking forward to having a traditional Catholic wedding, and was committed to making sure a first dance was part of their special day. 

Padma and Josh wanted to personalize their wedding dance with many unique elements. Josh brought creativity to the table with his vision for an “ironic baroque” dance, set to a favorite song by the band Vampire Weekend. Luckily, Padma was up for the challenge and had some ideas of her own. She suggested Ben E. King’s “Stand by Me” and an Elvis song. They wondered whether their vision could be translated to the dance floor.

For Steps to Love, the main challenge wasn’t unfamiliar – creating choreography for a couple without dance experience, and building their confidence along the way. The second challenge, designing a cohesive medley of four dances set to the couple’s choice of music…that was trickier, but entirely possible. The good news was they were starting early enough to create, rehearse, and polish the dance before Padma and Josh’s big day.

The experience: taking it step by step

Padma and Josh were committed to putting in some real studio time, so they signed up for the Wowza package, with nine sessions, plus a three-session add-on. They arrived on a Wednesday evening at the Steps to Love practice space – the spacious chapel at Forest Hill Christian Church, on Laguna Honda Blvd. in San Francisco.

Erin began by reviewing Padma and Josh’s music selections and getting to know the couple and their goals. She suggested a way to connect the pieces, and together they crafted a story that would help guide the process. Erin started them off on their dancing adventure by teaching the couple the foundational aspects of partner dancing, as well as some basic steps that would serve as building blocks for the unique choreography to come. She paid special attention to their natural movement styles, which would inform her choices along the way.

With each consecutive studio session, Erin layered the choreography a little more. She helped the two new dancers memorize their steps by creating a story that would be punctuated by dramatic, memorable moments. She suggested thoughts and emotions, to help them activate their imaginations and find a flow. Her main goal throughout was to keep things fun and center the couple’s upbeat personalities at the heart of the dance.

Surprise: a VIP appearance

For one of the last sessions, the couple brought Padma’s parents. They had just flown in from India and had never danced in their lives. They were good sports, though, and quickly picked up the simple steps that Erin proposed. There was a lot of cavorting and laughter. Padma said later, “It was just a blast, seeing my parents dance for the first time…they had so much fun.” The couple recorded the session so they could teach the same steps to Josh’s parents later on, and ultimately include them in the parents’ dance on the big day.

The results: pure joy and effortless dancing

The big day came quickly and the ceremony was flawless. At the reception, the crowd gathered on one side of the majestic, Victorian-style Arcade to watch Padma and Josh. take the floor. The music began and light sparkled from the surrounding balconies and an enormous skylight above. 

Padma describes the experience as “effortless.” She says, “We had such big smiles on our faces, we weren’t even thinking about what we were doing…just enjoying it.” The crowd cheered enthusiastically. Their dance medley was just as Padma and Josh had imagined, seamlessly flowing from one piece to the next, with easy transitions and a joyous, upbeat vibe.

After the wedding, the response from guests was overwhelmingly positive. The priest told them he’d been to hundreds of weddings, and this was likely the best dance he’d seen. Padma describes how attendees were amazed by how happy they seemed when they danced together: “They told us, ‘We didn’t know you guys could dance!’ And we told them no, we can’t dance! We learned how to dance in our lessons.” 

A lifetime of benefits

The benefits didn’t end on their wedding day. Padma and Josh still enjoy dancing and have eagerly taken the floor at a few social events, including a wedding and a retreat. They no longer watch from a table on the sidelines. Now, they feel comfortable getting out of their chairs and moving together to the music, when the mood strikes. And it does.

Thinking back, Padma and Josh recall the intensity of the wedding planning experience. They note how dancing together with Erin’s guidance was a big stress reliever and gave them so many moments of connection. Josh says planning the wedding “was an ordeal, but this was the fun part.” They even danced in the elevator between sessions. Padma describes these as “little joyous moments,” scattered across the months leading up to their big day. And they laugh with delight as they remember those moments, even today.